Its been 350 days since a day that I will never forget. Most people probably couldn’t tell you the date, or why that day is so significant in my life. That day absolutely, beyond the shadow of any doubt, changed my life more that I would have ever dreamed. Still today I fight the that day, often physically, but more often emotionally. The memories of those moments will come up, and remind me what a joy it is to be alive.
Sitting in the service Tuesday night, which is something I don’t do every often, I got a reality check. Matt’s was talking about having just one chance, having just one chance to make a difference for Jesus. Its one conversation. Its taking the time to tell someone about the answer they are searching for. If I would have known a year ago what would have happened, I would have no doubt done things differently. I would have stopped. I wouldn’t have been so rushed.
But honestly, I can’t really tell you who I was before this accident. The memory of the accident no doubt cloud the memories of life before it. I can’t tell you what I was thinking. But I’ve learned since the accident. I am a fighter; I will fight for what I know I need to do. The people that surrounded me after the accident, and likely before, will tell you that I wanted to do things on my own. There were days that I needed A LOT of help, but I tried to do it myself. I think this was because I knew that I needed to do it myself to prove to myself that I could.
Driving again absolutely was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. Learning to trust myself behind the wheel of a car was really hard. I remember driving for the first time; I couldn’t tell you the first time I drove by myself when I got my lisence, but I can tell you exactly where I was going when I drove by myself for the first time after the accident. But I can tell you that everytime I get in the car today, I am reminded of the grace of God and his hand all over my life. I am reminded that I was given a second chance at life that I didn’t deserve.
A second chance at life will change you. Having the opportunity to live again. I was telling someone my story about the accident a couple weeks ago. This was the comment that came out: “once you almost lose your life, you understand the importance of living each moment like its your last more than you ever have before.” Watching people come around me and help me when I needed it. The weeks of recovery that took everyone around me to help me heal. It shows you the importance of friends. It shows you how often you need to tell people that you love them. It shows you how little material things matter. It shows you how short life is.
I beg you friends, to count today like it matters. Today could be the last chance you have to live. I never knew that almost a year ago I almost lost my life. I wouldn’t change what happened because I am a better person because of it. My testimony is a picture of God’s grace and how much love he has for us. If you’ve never heard the story, ask me about it. I’ll show you how faithful God really was through the whole situation.
I’m learning right now to trust in the Lord and know that his plan is way greater than the plan I had for myself. It’s a time that I don’t know what I’m going to do, but I know that I have to trust in the Lord. He has a plan that is a lot bigger than I could ever dream for myself.
Keep seeking. Love each of you.
And here are some of the pictures of the car. Thankfully there aren't any of me, but you can see that I came out alive of something I know I shouldn't have.
